January 29th / 31st, 2010
"The Worm Turns for John Edwards"
Ever since the National Enquirer broke the story that John Edwards had a
child with his campaign mistress Rielle Hunter, the senator-turned-presidential
candidate spent the better part of two years denying the affair.
Confronted with overwhelming evidence to the contrary, however, Edwards finally
came clean (if that's possible) and admitted a sexual indiscretion, but
denied that he fathered baby Quinn. Now, faced with revelations and fallout
from an upcoming book by his former aid Andrew Young, Edwards last week owned
up to being the little girl's daddy. Young is best remembered as the loyal
minion who fell on his sword for Edwards by claiming he, not John, was the
father of Rielle's child. But in his tell-all book, "The Politician", Young
now says Edwards asked him to take the fall, and even arrange for a fake
paternity test.
And so, the worm has turned on a worm of a man, whose own worm got him
into big trouble. Meanwhile, John's long-suffering wife Elizabeth has herself
become insufferable. Last year when hubby John wanted to move mistress and
child to North Carolina, Liz freaked out. She embarked on a pity party
tour, and aired all of her family's dirty laundry in public. At first we felt
sorry for her, but her scorned wife act grew tiresome, and her true colors
began to show. Appearing on"Oprah", Elizabeth repeatedly referred to
Hunter's baby as "it". Now baby "it" is officially an Edwards, and Liz has just
shut down her facebook page, announcing, "my marriage shouldn't be on
anybody's radar screen except mine". Sorry Liz, but that train left the station
when you paraded your family and your marital problems in front of the whole
nation.
Rumors are circulating that John and Elizabeth are splitting, but that
might be the least of little John's problems. Federal prosecutors here in
North Carolina are still probing Edwards' campaign finances, looking in
particular at the $100,000 he paid to Mistress Hunter for supposed video
production. And then there are the regular monthly checks for $17,000 that Hunter
received via Edwards's attorney.
If any of these expenditures were made improperly, Edwards will spend time
behind bars.
For now the artful dodger has escaped to Haiti in what Sphere.com's Katie
Drummond calls a "fortuitously-timed humanitarian effort". It seems
ironic, though, that the guy who has created so many man-made disasters, now
offers his assistance with a natural one. Maybe his act will play well in
Haiti, but I'm not buying his motives for one minute. The trip to Port-au-Prince
is just his way of escaping the kitchen because he couldn't stand the
heat. And if ever there was a man who needed to stay out of heat, it's John
Edwards.
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