Triad Today

Late last month the American Film Institute honored Nicole Kidman for her lifetime of achievement. But Nicole is only 56 years old, which raises the question, “What constitutes a lifetime?” Inquiring minds want to know because every year hundreds of organizations give out lifetime achievement awards. In addition to AFI, there’s the Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award, the Oscar’s Honorary Award, the Kennedy Center Honors, and my favorite, the Bram Stoker Award for Lifetime Achievement, named for a man who created a vampire who I believe has been eligible for over 700 lifetime achievement awards. 

Kidman’s relative youth is not unique among so-called lifetime honorees. In fact, plenty of other entertainers have been recognized in their 50s, like Orson Welles, Harrison Ford, and Jack Nicholson, and some, like Steven Spielberg and Tom Hanks, have even been honored in their 40s. 

The groups who present these awards set no age restrictions, but they are very clear about their general criteria. AFI’s original by-laws required that a lifetime achievement recipient’s work “must have stood the test of time” (that was later amended to include folks with an active career). The Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences reserves its Honorary Award “to honor extraordinary distinction in lifetime achievement.” The Grammys presents their award for “performers who, during their lifetimes, have made creative contributions of outstanding artistic significance to the field of recording.” And the Kennedy Center Honors are given to those in the performing arts “for their lifetime of contributions to American culture.”

OK, so once again I pose the question, “What constitutes a lifetime?” Peter O’Toole received an Honorary Oscar in his 80s, and Lillian Gish was 90 when she picked up the AFI Lifetime Achievement award. Clearly, they and other elderly honorees have amassed an impressive body of work over many decades. But it doesn’t make any sense to honor anyone for a lifetime of achievement when their lifetime is far from over. 

Last year, the CDC’s National Center for Health Statistics reported that the average life expectancy in America is 76.1 years, while the United Nations claimed a higher number at 79 years. Regardless, a lifetime achievement award for someone in their 40s or 50s seems premature and a bit disingenuous, sort of like if 6-year-old Prince Louis of Wales wrote an autobiography titled My Life Story. Perhaps AFI and other groups might consider more definable benchmarks for awarding lifetime achievement, such as actual retirement age. In America, for example, the average age of retirement is 63. Or if these esteemed award-giving organizations want to be more age-inclusive, they could align their criteria with those of professional golf, which allows veteran players to move to the seniors tour once they reach 50, which is also about the time you start receiving mail from AARP.  In any case, we really need a clear consensus on what constitutes a “lifetime,” especially when recognizing individual achievement.

Once when confronted by Professor Van Helsing, Stoker’s Dracula said, “For one who has not lived even a single lifetime, you are a wise man, Van Helsing.” This tells us two important things. First, Dracula respects his enemies, and second, Van Helsing is not yet eligible for an award.

I’m old enough to have watched the very first televised presidential debate back in 1960 between Vice President Richard Nixon and Senator John Kennedy. I was not, however, old enough then to understand how optics translates to votes. According to surveys, people who listened to the debate on radio thought Nixon won because of his ability to best articulate domestic and foreign policy issues. But those who watched the debate on television saw Kennedy as the hands-down winner. That’s because Nixon refused to wear make-up, had a 5 o’clock shadow, and wore a suit that clashed with the color of the studio background, while JFK showed up tanned, rested, and dressed in telegenic attire. The difference in the two men’s appearance and demeanor was enough to swing the election to Kennedy in what turned out to be the closest presidential contest in history. 

Since then, I have watched presidential debates every time they were televised. I saw Jimmy Carter look weak in 1980, and four years later I watched Reagan look old and confused in his first debate with Walter Mondale. I witnessed George H.W. Bush looking bored in his 1992 three-way debate with Bill Clinton and Ross Perot. I’ve seen candidates misspeak like when Gerald Ford said there was no Soviet domination of Eastern Europe. And I saw Obama take Mitt Romney to school over military equipment in one of their debates. But never have I seen anything to compare with the performance of Joe Biden in last week’s CNN debate with Donald Trump. Biden shuffled out onto the stage, looked old and pale, gave incoherent answers, and lost his train of thought on several occasions. It was hands-down the worst debate performance I’ve ever witnessed, and it came against an opponent who is a lying, sexist, misogynist, white supremacist adulterer who incited an insurrection and also happens to be a convicted felon. Any incumbent president should have been able to win a debate against that kind of a man, but Joe Biden couldn’t.

Here’s a sampling of Biden’s incoherent answers. 

When trying to explain the revenues we would accrue from his tax plan, Biden completely lost his train of thought and said, “We’ll be able to do the things we need to do, [pause] everything with COVID [pause], I mean [pause], look, we finally beat Medicare.” 

When responding to Trump’s claim that illegal immigrants were killing Americans, Biden said, “A young woman who was murdered, he went to the funeral, and she was murdered by an immigrant, but there are a lot of young women who are raped by their in-laws, spouses, and sisters, and they can do nothing about it when they cross the state line.” Call me naïve, but I don’t know of any woman who has ever been raped by her sister.   

And when trying to take credit for a reduction in border crossings, Biden said, “I’m going to continue to do more until we get a total ban on border patrol.”

During the 90-minute debate, Biden did manage to come out of his slumber a few times and deliver some zingers, like when Trump said, “Let’s not act like children,” Uncle Joe retorted, “You ARE a child.” And speaking of Trump’s sexual encounter with a porn star, Biden said, “You have the morals of an alley cat.”  

Also to his credit, Joe did occasionally speak of his policy positions and accomplishments which have helped millions of Americans, but he never articulated them with any conviction, or without slurring his words. 

In the post-debate panel discussions, CNN analysts were dismayed by the texts they were receiving from leaders in the Democratic Party, calling Biden’s performance “dismal” and his answers “incoherent.” Biden’s friend and former Obama advisor David Axelrod said the President “seemed disoriented.” And Van Jones said it was painful to watch, “I love Joe Biden, but he failed,” said Jones. Their consensus was that Biden should get out of the race so that a viable candidate could step in to take on Trump in November.

As I mentioned before, plenty of candidates have had a weak debate performances and one could posit that Biden’s CNN disaster was similar to Reagan’s first debate with Mondale which made the Gipper look old and confused. But the comparison doesn’t hold up. Reagan came back strong in the second debate and even made light of the age issue. Not only that, but Reagan was 73 at the time and Joe Biden is 81. The other problem is that Reagan was a popular president, while Biden’s approval numbers were in the 30s before the debate. Also, Reagan always seemed youthful, engaged, and communicated a positive vision for the future, while Biden just looks and acts old and can’t articulate a vision for the country even if he had one.

I am no fan of Donald Trump and will never vote for him, but as an impartial journalist, I am compelled to say that Uncle Joe cooked his goose on that debate stage. If the Dems want to beat Trump, someone better convince Biden to drop out now and let California Governor Gavin Newsom step in as the party’s standard bearer. If not, we could have a reboot of 1960, where once again, the man with the tan will win the White House.

Over the past 20 years, North Carolina has had its share of municipal scandal and controversy. Town and city managers have made news for everything from sleeping with co-workers to domestic disturbances. And even on a good day, it’s not unusual to see local governing boards get into heated arguments about one thing or another, usually involving the allocation of tax dollars. But in the midst of this turbulence, Forsyth County has enjoyed largely smooth sailing when it comes to governance and administration, and for that we have Dudley Watts to thank.

After a stint as manager of Granville County, Watts, a native of Durham, was tapped to manage Forsyth County, a position he’s held since 2006. Now after 18 years of service to the community, he is retiring. I first met Dudley three years ago when we launched Forsyth County Connections, a monthly television series that keeps residents informed about various public services and programs. I caught up with Dudley recently during a taping of our TV show and we talked about his life and career.

JL: Tell me about your childhood and what activities you were into.

DW: I kinda did everything, but nothing all that well. I was a pole vaulter in high school, but I never made it over the bar [laughs]. I played football for a while and played tuba in the band. I was active in the church youth group and was an Eagle Scout. My father passed away from cancer when I was in high school, so my mom and I had to run a small convenience store for a while. Those were tough times, but I learned a lot and it really shaped my life.

JL: You graduated from N.C. State and did graduate work at UNC before landing jobs in communications and government. What attracted you to the county manager job in Forsyth?

DW: It was a dream job in a dream place. Mom grew up in Lexington, so I had family in the area and Forsyth had a long history of good local government.

JL: You submitted your final budget earlier this month, and, as always, things went off pretty much without a hitch. How has that process worked so well?

DW: I’ve got a group of department managers who care very deeply about providing high-level service to residents, and they do so in a very fiscally responsible way. They scrutinize requests, and then my job has always been to provide the commissioners with recommendations, but to do it in a way that gives them an ability to change it and really make it theirs. 

JL: Let’s talk about economic development and highlight some projects that have come to fruition during your tenure, starting with Innovation Quarter.

DW: When I started here back in 2006 and I’d drive down Liberty Street, all those buildings that are now the vibrant Innovation Quarter, they were all shuttered, and the amount of change since then has been tremendous. The county and the city played an integral role in making that happen by making incentives available to developers.

JL: Your thoughts on Whitaker Park?

DW: Whitaker Park was being discussed right when I arrived. It was a Reynolds facility that was underutilized, and the company worked with a non-profit development authority along with city and county support to revitalize that area which is now amazing. Purple Crow is in there and so is Second Harvest Food Bank, and some apartments are being developed. That was another area of the county that was shuttered which is now vibrant.

JL: What about Caterpillar?

DW: Caterpillar was recruited here and built a tremendous facility. They then converted to a subsidiary company and are doing some manufacturing of heavy mining equipment. It has been a real success.

JL: Smith Reynolds Airport is doing well too.

DW: Yes. That land has always been owned by the county, and it used to operate with a separate governmental authority, but several years ago we collapsed it into a county department. Mark Davidson worked through that transition as the leader there and he is now a department manager in the county. That gave Mark access to bond financing opportunities and the support of the county infrastructure, plus we got a lot of federal and state money there. We’ve expanded facilities and improved the maintenance overhaul operation. The terminal building is getting ready to be updated, and we’ve got two new hangars there which adds to the bottom line.

JL: You’ve always had a vision for developing downtown Winston-Salem. Talk about what we’ve come to know as the “Downtown Strategy.”

DW: Winston-Salem City Manager Lee Garrity came in about the same time that I did, as did Jason Thiel who was head of development, and there was clearly an effort to revitalize downtown. Back then the Mayor used to joke that if you shot a cannon down 4th Street at 5 o’clock, you wouldn’t have to worry about hitting anybody [laughs]. So, we got with Jason and with folks in the community and said, ‘Where’s the county’s footprint, and what do we need to do?”, and the results have been pretty remarkable.

JL: Let’s also mention that during your tenure as county manager, there has been an expansion of and addition to parks, and places for people to have fun, like Tanglewood and Festival of Lights.

DW: A lot of that was driven by the Board of Commissioners and what I observed that they were invested in. For example, one of the things I heard a lot about back then was getting the campground at Tanglewood back up and running, so we did, and it has been a remarkable success, producing a couple hundred thousand dollars in revenue for the county every year which supports county operations. It’s also great to develop new parks like Belews Lake Park which we’ll open up soon and the agricultural park near Tobaccoville. Preserving open space is part of maintaining quality of life for this community.

JL: Do you feel pretty good about how the County is doing these days?

DW: Yes. The facility and infrastructure side of it is good. There have been a lot of investments and not a lot of deferred maintenance through that. We are an organization that really focuses on providing a good quality level of service, but within the confines of not trying to buy any more government than we need.

JL: What will you miss about being County Manager?

DW: I’ll miss the people. I have been blessed in my career to work with wonderfully dedicated staff and elected officials. They all have this high level of expectation of the community and how we treat people. I’ll also miss the excitement of working on projects that will set the stage for something that you know will be good in the future.

JL: What will you not miss?

DW: Some of the stress of Thursday board meetings, but I’ve always enjoyed them after they were over [laughs]. But seriously there’s not too much that I won’t miss because this has been a remarkable opportunity for me.

All in all, it has been an amazing career for the pole-vaulting boy from Durham who never made it over the bar, then managed to raise it for the rest of us.

Growing up in the 1950s and early 1960s, I was addicted to television even before I could walk, and my Dad took me to see my first movie as soon as I had graduated from diapers. Of course, I wanted to emulate on-screen heroes like Superman and John Wayne, but one of my most lasting impressions from watching movies and TV shows had to do with listening to them. I was enamored with main title themes from TV shows like Peter Gunn, and scores from films like The Creature from the Black Lagoon. Only later did I come to realize that actual mortals compose such music, and one of my favorite musical mortals was Henry Mancini, who, as it turned out, I had the pleasure of interviewing back in 1980. More on that later.

Mancini was born on April 16, 1924, in Maple Heights, Ohio. His early interest in music led him to study at Julliard, then at age 18 he enlisted in the Army Air Force where he was discovered by bandleader Glenn Miller who recommended young Henry for the Air Force band. When World War II ended, Mancini worked as a pianist and arranger for Miller’s orchestra and soon thereafter he landed a job in the Universal Studios music department.

During his six-year stint at Universal, Henry helped to score a number of films for which he received no credit, and others where the studio let him shine, like on The Glenn Miller Story, which garnered Mancini his first Oscar nomination (he would go on to win four Oscars in his long career). Henry struck out on his own in 1958 and soon teamed up with producer/director Blake Edwards for the first of their many collaborations, the groundbreaking TV series Peter Gunn. The soundtrack from that series won Mancini his first Grammy. Over the next four decades, he would go on to win 19 more.

The Mancini/Edwards team won wide acclaim for such films as Breakfast at Tiffany’s (whose big hit was “Moon River”), The Days of Wine and Roses, Charade, and a slew of Pink Panther outings. Mancini was also successful scoring films away from Edwards including Touch of Evil, Silver Streak, and Mommie Dearest. Aside from Peter Gunn, some of Henry’s notable TV themes include Mr. Lucky, Newhart, Remington Steele, The Thornbirds, and the NBC Mystery Movie theme.

But Mancini’s work stretched far beyond music for movies and TV. In all, he recorded 90 albums, eight of which went gold, and he composed music in all genres, from jazz and country to soul. And now, 100 years after his birth, a group of award-winning musicians have honored Henry with a re-recording of his hits in a new album, which is scheduled for release on June 21. (Individual cuts bowed on YouTube April 16 on what would have been Mancini’s 100th birthday.) Titled, Henry Mancini, the 100th Sessions, the album features stars like Michael Buble (“Moon River”), James Galway and Lizzo (“The Pink Panther”), and Quincy Jones and John Williams (“Peter Gunn”). It was nostalgic for Williams who served as Mancini’s pianist on the original Peter Gunn album in 1958.

100th Sessions is being produced by Henry’s son-in-law Greg Field who also played drums on the re-recording of “The Pink Panther”. Field told CBS News that while most people under 50 have never heard of Henry Mancini, “I can’t imagine another composer who has created music that generations and generations through the decades keep resonating with people.”

And now to my story about the time I interviewed Henry Mancini.

In 1980, I started a video production company while still hosting a daily talk show on WXEX-TV (now WRIC) in Richmond, Virginia. I also freelanced as a radio announcer on WSVS am 1340, which was based in Petersburg. Henry was scheduled to give an upcoming concert in Richmond so several weeks prior, I called him to do a radio interview which would serve to promote the concert. The taped interview went well, mainly because Henry was so easy to talk to, plus it didn’t hurt that I was a big fan. As I recall, we spoke for about 15 minutes, said our goodbyes, and hung up. About a minute later the station engineer came running in to tell me that something went wrong with the tape and that none of the interview had been recorded. My heart sank. The engineer apologized and then rightly suggested that Mr. Mancini would never know about the mistake because he would never have heard the broadcast anyway. But we were talking about a man I really admired, so I swallowed my pride and called Henry back. I told him what had happened, and he very calmly said, “That’s OK, Jim. We’ll do it again.”

When asked what he admired most about his friend Henry Mancini, John Williams said, “He’s one of the nicest men I’ve ever known.” On that day in 1980, I found out what Maestro Williams meant.

Having played organized baseball in my youth, I developed what turned out to be an unrealistic sense of fair play, which I thought applied to every facet of life. In baseball, both teams begin the game with a score of 0 to 0, and thus have an equal chance of winning. The distances to the fence and between bases are the same for both sides, and the foul pole tells you what’s fair and what’s not. And, of course, the team with the most runs at the end of the game wins the contest. In other words, the rules and boundaries don’t favor one team over another. But imagine what would happen if one team had a five-run head start before the game even begins. It would be unfair and chaotic, and that is exactly what has happened to politics in America, and especially here in North Carolina.

For much of this century, North Carolina has been regarded as a “purple” state mainly because the number of registered voters are pretty much equally divided between Republican, Democrat, and unaffiliated. We are also regarded as a “swing” state when it comes to presidential elections because our diverse electorate could swing the national election either way. As a result, and, given that we picked up an extra House district after the 2020 census, there is a reasonable expectation that our Congressional delegation would be evenly split between Republicans and Democrats. Yet, for years now, our GOP-controlled state legislature has done everything in its power to diminish and dismantle the political and demographic equity reflected in our populace. Their efforts have been so blatantly partisan that every time they draw up new Congressional district lines, the courts have had to intervene. That happened several years ago when the court established a panel of “special masters” to re-draw district boundaries in a fair and equitable manner. The three special masters came up with a map that resulted in our state having seven Republicans and seven Democrats to represent us in Congress. But soon after the 2022 election, our state lawmakers re-drew the map in such a way as to potentially give Republicans an 11 to 3 edge in this fall’s elections. And, thanks to Trump-appointed judges at every level, that gerrymandered map could be in effect for decades to come, unless a group called “NC for Fair Elections” (NCFE) can prevail with their legal challenge which was filed on May 10.

NCFE and its 11 plaintiffs who reside in gerrymandered districts, are suing the State Board of Elections, Senate Pro Tem president Phil Berger, and N.C. House Speaker Tim Moore for drawing up district boundaries that violate their voting rights. Leading NCFE’s legal team is former State Supreme Court Justice Robert Orr, who also served as one of the Special Masters prior to the 2022 midterm elections. The state has filed a motion to dismiss which will be heard by a three-judge panel on June 13. I recently spoke with my friend Bob Orr about the lawsuit.

Jim: First of all, why was NC for Fair Elections created?

Orr: The group and the lawsuit grew out of my interest in resolving the basic question of whether North Carolina citizens have a Constitutional right to fair elections. Fair elections in this context means that government does not interfere or try to preordain the results of the electoral process by stacking the deck.

Jim: So, what is the basic argument in your brief, and is it Constitutionally sound?

Orr:  The argument is pretty simple. Our State Constitution has a provision (article 1, Sec. 36) that says in essence that even though specific rights of the people are set out in the Constitution (enumerated rights), the people still retain other rights (unenumerated rights) that protect them from government action. Secondly, we contend that the most basic right retained but unenumerated, is the right to fair elections. After all, democracy is built on the election of officials. If government can stack the deck and preordain the outcome of these elections, then that’s not fair. Third, the General Assembly’s use of sophisticated political data and computers allowed them in selected districts (NC 6, NC 13, NC 14, SD 7, and HD 105) to rearrange voters so as to virtually guarantee who wins.  

Jim: If you should prevail, how soon could we see new maps created?

Orr: Regardless of the decision at the trial level, the case would in all likelihood go up on appeal, thus the ultimate resolution would not come until 2025. If we prevail, the districts would need to be redrawn and finalized prior to the 2025 election.  

Jim: If you do not prevail, what is it going to take for us to get fair maps?

Orr: If we lose this case, I see no way that there will be any significant change in the process in my lifetime.

The Voting Rights Act was signed into law nearly 60 years ago, and it was supposed to protect against all forms of voter suppression. The problem is that proponents of that Act didn’t foresee how future state legislators would circumvent federal law by simply redrawing voting districts. Right now, a majority of North Carolina’s General Assembly members are deliberately suppressing the votes of Democrats in general and Blacks in particular. These partisan politicians are trying to win the game before it even starts because they’re afraid of a fair fight. Thank goodness for men like Bob Orr who are fighting to level the playing field and preserve one of our most sacred rights.

To read the entire NCFE brief, visit NCforFairElections.com.

One of my pet peeves is when a media critic or a performing arts group names the 100 best films of all time, or the 50 best TV shows of all time. Frequently these kinds of lists are based on such things as awards, ratings, or box office receipts. In doing so, they disregard likeability. Sure, Citizen Kane is a great film, but it is not a particularly enjoyable film. I might watch Kane once every few years, but I watch Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein several times a year. I’m a big fan of the widely acclaimed The X Files, but if I have some spare time, I’ll load up an episode of The Andy Griffith Show. My point is that while most “Best Lists” profess to be authoritative, they are purely subjective.

And that brings me to my list of the funniest Saturday Night Live sketches of all time as the iconic show approaches its 50th anniversary.  

For the sake of brevity, I’ve limited my list to the top 20. That means I’ve had to omit some really good sketches like the “Dinner Date” with The Rock and his Brit gal Jemma, Gerard Butler and Kristen Wiig’s “Beauty and the Beast,” and Eddie Murphy’s first “Mister Robinson’s Neighborhood.”  Nevertheless, my top 20 are segments that I can watch over and over again and laugh out loud with each viewing. Here they are ranked from oldest to newest. 

“The Exorcist” 
This classic satire appeared on SNL’s seventh episode which was broadcast in December of 1975, and featured Richard Pryor as one of the priests who attempts to exorcize the devil from Lorraine Newman. “Father” Pryor’s initial fear and his final solution make this my all-time favorite SNL sketch.

“Word Association Job Interview”
Also showing up in that same episode was this masterful exchange between Pryor and Chevy Chase, with Richard as a job applicant and Chevy as the employment officer. It was a primer in the use of racist language. Chase told me, “Rich and I wrote that about a half an hour before the show.”

“Julia Child”
During the first few years, Danny Ackroyd was the glue that held SNL together. He could write and act with equal aplomb and was always funny. In this skit he parodies cooking host Julia Child, but with a bloody twist.

“Wild and Crazy Guys”
Airing in September of 1977, Steve Martin (in his third time hosting) teamed with Ackroyd to portray the Festrunk brothers who are looking for women with “big American breasts.”

“Ebony and Ivory”
This 1982 sketch featured Eddie Murphy as Stevie Wonder and Joe Piscopo as Frank Sinatra set in a recording studio where they perform a satirical version of the popular McCartney/Wonder hit of the same year. Eddie and Joe’s impressions of the two singers are spot on. 

“President Reagan, Mastermind”
During his tenure on SNL, Phil Hartman was the hands-down MVP of the show. In this 1986 sketch, Hartman portrays Ronald Reagan as a tough, brilliant commander-in-chief when meeting privately with staff, then pretends to be a kindly old mental lightweight when greeting the public. 

“President Clinton Visits McDonalds”
A highlight of season 18 (1992) was this hilarious bit with Hartman as Bill Clinton who was supposed to be on a jog with his Secret Service detail, but pops into McDonalds instead. Clinton, who at the time was overweight and loved to eat, pretended to be greeting patrons and using that as an excuse for eating everything in sight. “Go get me a coke,” Clinton tells an agent who responds, “But we can’t tell Mrs. Clinton.” Hartman replies, “There’s gonna be a whole LOT of things we don’t tell Mrs. Clinton.” 

“Motivational Speaker”
In May of 1993, Chris Farley debuted the character of Matt Foley, a hyper-motivational speaker who lives in a van down by the river. He is brought in by parents Phil Hartman and Julia Sweeney to motivate their teenagers played by Christina Applegate and David Spade, neither of whom can keep a straight face at Farley’s antics.

“Schweddy Balls”
In this bit from 1998, Molly Shannon and Ana Gasteyer play co-hosts of an NPR show called “Delicious Dish” where they interview noted baker Pete Schweddy played by Alec Baldwin. The sketch is filled with double entendres about Pete’s holiday treats. It’s a classic.

“Charles and Camilla”
In a 2005 edition of Weekend Update, co-anchors Tina Fey and Amy Poehler welcome special guests Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles to talk about their impending wedding. Seth Meyers portrayed Charles and Fred Armisen was Camilla. Watching this set piece live, I laughed harder than I ever had before or since. It still cracks me up.

“Sarah Palin & Hillary Clinton”
Just prior to the 2008 Presidential election, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler played Palin and Clinton respectively in an address to the public about sexism in politics. Alaska Governor Palin was John McCain’s painfully uniformed VP pick and Clinton (who lost to Obama in the primary) was frustrated with having to share a stage with Palin whose only foreign affairs experience was in saying, “I can see Russia from my house!”

“Match’d”
This hilarious sketch from 2014 featured Woody Harrelson as a Marine vet-turned-host of a dating show in which Cecily Strong had to choose from among three horny bachelors. Her questions and their responses were all sexually explicit until the guys learned that Harrelson was Cecily’s father. If I had a top 10 for generating laughs, this would be in it.

“Live Report”
This 2016 entry marked the debut of Mikey Day’s quiet, un-manly Matt Schatt character, paired with the gorgeous Margot Robbie. The couple had just witnessed a large sinkhole and TV reporter Kenan Thompson was on scene to interview them. Kenan was in comic disbelief at learning that the couple was married “to each other,” and that some of Matt’s genitalia was missing. 

“Bern the Enthusiasm”
This is perhaps SNL’s best-written sketch of all time thanks to the contributions of Larry David who fashioned the 2016 segment as if it were an episode of his HBO show. Instead of playing himself, David portrayed Senator Bernie Sanders whose Larry David-like crankiness cost him the election by a predictable margin.      

“First Date”
It’s hard to describe this brilliant 2017 sketch without giving away the big reveal. Gal Gadot plays a woman who had been out of the country and unaware of anything that happened during the 1990’s. She is having a first date with Kenan Thompson who (SPOILER ALERT) turns out to be O.J. Simpson. You’ll scream at the silverware reference.  

“Kiss Me, I’m Irish”
In this 2018 sketch Cecily Strong, Kate McKinnon, and Aidy Bryant play contestants on an Irish TV dating show. The bachelor is played by Bill Hader who learns during the course of questioning that he has a lot in common with two of the Irish women, one of who recently lost her lucky “charms” to him. 

“Girlfriend Game Night”
That same year MVP Strong turned in another great performance, this time as the young wife of a 90-plus-year-old man (Bill Hader) who is wheelchair-bound. Unbeknownst to her card night gal pals (Heidi Gardner, Aidy Bryant, and Melissa Villasenor), she brings husband Horace along for a very special reason. Be prepared to bump into furniture as you laugh at the reason.

“Traffic Altercation”
In this 2023 bit, “Abbott Elementary’s” Quinta Brunson is an aggressive driver who cut off Mikey Day in traffic. Their two vehicles pull up side by side at a stop light and they proceed to use an obscene form of sign language to chastise each other rather than just roll down their windows and yell. 

“Home Videos” 
This 2024 entry is one of SNL’s most brilliantly conceived sketches. It opens with Andrew Dismukes sitting on a sofa between his two elderly parents played by Dakota Johnson and Mikey Day. Andrew is curious to see what’s on some old VHS home movies, the first of which shows him as a small child. The next video is labeled “How we met,” and what it reveals is a layered web of sex and scandal that led to his parents hooking up.

“Beavis and Butthead”
I almost hesitated to include this sketch in my list because the premise is weird and the script itself is not particularly funny. But what makes this mock News Nation town hall meeting so hilarious is how moderator Heidi Gardner breaks character and completely loses it upon seeing Mikey Day’s make-up as Butthead (Ryan Gosling plays Beavis). You just can’t help but laugh at her laughter.

So, there you have my top 20 funniest Saturday Night Live sketches. Let us know if you think of others that should have made the cut.

Most cities are represented by a distinctive fixture. For example, Winston-Salem has its teapot, Thomasville has its giant chair, and High Point has Dave Briggs who, for the past 13 years, has served as director of High Point Theatre and one of the city’s biggest cheerleaders.

Dave is a native of Ohio and holds degrees from Muskingum University, Pittsburgh State University, and UNCG. Along the way, his journey in theatre management has taken him from Lenoir and Hickory to Baton Rouge before landing in High Point.

Over the years Dave has brought top-flight talent to the area, presenting every genre of the performing arts from bluegrass to Broadway, from comedy to classical, and from dance to drama. He’s even turned the spotlight on a number of cultural icons from the world of television including Ben Vereen (Roots), Hal Linden (Barney Miller), Barbara Eden (I Dream of Jeannie), Dawn Wells (Gilligan’s Island), and Cindy Williams (Laverne & Shirley).

But as good as Dave is at booking performers, he’s even better at bringing visitors and dollars into the city. During his tenure, theatre attendance has grown from 40,000 patrons per year to over 70,000 annually. Moreover, the theatre’s economic impact on High Point has increased from $4.5 million dollars to over $13.5 million dollars per year.

Dave is also a tireless ambassador for High Point, serving on a number of regional, statewide, and national arts boards, and making regular appearances on Triad Today. Using my connection with the latter, I contacted Dave and got him to talk about his career.

Jim: Did you have an interest in music and theatre as a child?

Dave: Not really. I was a sports fanatic. I played baseball, soccer, football, basketball, and tennis. I discovered my love for theatre in my freshman year of high school when I was cast in a mystery spoof. I’ve always enjoyed singing and all kinds of music from Vivaldi to the Rolling Stones.

Jim: What led you to a career in theatre management?

Dave: It was something of a wonderful accident. In college, I was a theatre major and helped bring concerts to campus. I also had some wonderful experiences with actors like Mercedes McCambridge, Ossie Davis, Ruby Dee, and Victor Buono. They taught me a lot about perseverance and going after my dreams. I taught high school for four years, then served as production manager at Wilkes Community College. After working on the tech side of the industry I knew I would prefer working in management. My next job was at Lenoir-Rhyne where I was a combination technical director/auditorium manager. There, I was able to increase community engagement and increased rentals for the college by tenfold. I also handled their contract negotiations for artists and contracting. The road then led to the Broyhill Center in Lenoir, the Shaw Center in Baton Rouge, and back here to run High Point Theatre. 

Jim: What attracted you to the job at High Point Theatre?

Dave:  I had been deeply involved in North Carolina Presenters and had worked with Louisa Hart to help her bring artists to High Point over the years. She called and asked if I’d like to come back to this area. I applied and the rest is history. 

Jim: How did you manage to keep High Point Theatre going during the Covid pandemic? 

Dave: We stayed busy doing various projects that had been on hold. Painting, carpet replacement, working with artists, agents, managers, and colleagues to try to keep up morale. We were fortunate that city management did not put us in mothballs, which meant that once things started clearing up we were able to hit the ground running. We also installed live stream gear so we could keep some of our dance competitions and recital business going. It was a very challenging time and many of my colleagues and their venues did not survive.

Jim: You’ve always booked a diverse selection of performers every season…racially, culturally, and categorically. Was that by design? 

Dave: Yes, it is by design. We present for the whole community, so I try to bring in a wide variety of quality artists and shows. I’m very proud of the work my team and I have done in that regard.

Jim: What are your plans now?

Dave: I’ve started Dave’s Arts Management Network, where I’ll be working with non-profit groups, municipalities, and smaller arts agencies in developing business strategies, and even advising on theatre design and the purchase of technical equipment.

Jim: You’ve been appearing on Triad Today since 2016, both as a spokesperson for High Point Theatre and as a member of the Roundtable. Did you mind me giving you the title of “Mr. Theatre?” 

Dave: I’m flattered by that moniker. It’s fun to have patrons come into the theatre and call me “Mr. Theatre.” It means that the information we provide on Triad Today is reaching them. Many of them like that I provide counterpoint on the Round Table as well. 

Fortunately for us, Dave isn’t leaving the Triad. He will run his new business from High Point, and that’s a relief because it’s hard to replace a community fixture.

For more information about Dave’s Arts Management Network, visit DavesArtsManagement.net or call 336-880-1075.

According to a 2022 EdWeek Research Center survey, 10% of K-12 public school teachers have been physically assaulted or attacked by a student. Meanwhile, the American Psychological Association reports that one in every five teachers who were assaulted did not report the attack to school administrators, indicating that the problem is much worse than we know. 

It should come as no surprise then, that last Tuesday a male student at Parkland High School walked up to the front of his classroom and began shouting profanities at the female teacher who was seated at her desk. All of a sudden the student landed a hard slap to the right side of the teacher’s face. He then stepped back and asked if she wanted another slap. “I don’t want it,” she said. Nevertheless, the male student gave her another slap to the face which snapped her head back and to the left, knocking her glasses to the floor. “You think that affected me?” the teacher said. The student then danced back to the other side of the room shouting, “Ain’t nobody coming. You just got slapped. Go back to teaching.”

At least one student videotaped the confrontation while the others either said nothing or laughed, and none of them ran for help or came to their teacher’s aide. Soon afterward the male student was arrested and charged with a misdemeanor. In some ways, the charge itself is as disgusting as the crime.

If one researches the legal definition of assault and the category of crime to which it can apply, it is clear that an attack of the Parkland kind constitutes a felony because it was carried out against a “protected class,” which includes police officers, healthcare workers, judges, and teachers. But not here in good old North Carolina. In our state, if you’re under 17 and full grown, you can get away with assaulting a teacher and only be charged with a Class 1 misdemeanor. In other words what that male student did last week only constitutes a “simple assault.” Even worse, the young perp in question will now be tried in juvenile court, will probably serve a minimum sentence, and will then be released and put on probation. The blame for this miscarriage of justice lies squarely with section 14 of our state code.

The female Parkland teacher is to be commended for keeping her calm in the face of real physical violence, and she is lucky not to have endured serious injury. Had her nose been broken, however, then the assailant might have been charged with a felony. But it shouldn’t take a broken bone to send this student to an adult prison. The slaps he landed were hard enough to cause bodily harm, not to mention emotional trauma. Regardless of state statutes, what he did rises to the level of a felony. 

And while I’m ranting about our local judicial system, let me also say that I’m sick and tired of having to refer to a young criminal as “student,” “assailant,” “male,” or “him.” This despicable student has a name, and it should have been published as soon as he was in custody. He hit like a man and he deserves to be exposed and tried as a man.

So where do we go from here? For one thing, we need to reform our state codes and make physical assault a felony for anyone over the age of 14. In addition, every high school classroom should be equipped with a wireless panic button that teachers can push to summon the SRO if a violent incident occurs. We also need to rethink the phrase “see something, say something,” to “see something, DO something.” The students in that Parkland classroom who sat back and laughed while the teacher was under attack, should be charged with aiding and abetting the assault. 

Meanwhile, U.S. Attorney General Merrick Garland promised to convene task forces and launch investigations to solve the problem of teacher assaults, but that was three years ago, and the problem persists. And then there are some who say that we could prevent students from committing violent crimes if only there were more social workers assigned to schools. Michelle Jordan the magnet school coordinator at Brunson Elementary told the Winston-Salem Journal last week, “People aren’t born wanting to do what that young man did.”  With all due respect to Ms. Jordan, while parental behavior, environment, and peer pressure play a role in turning a child to crime, I believe that some kids ARE born to do exactly what the Parkland student did, and no amount of counseling will cure him. Regardless, we don’t do people like him any favors by slapping him on the wrist. There is nothing simple about assault, and turning the other cheek doesn’t work for teachers or society.