If there was a competition for who gets the most media exposure it would be a tight race between Donald Trump and Blake Lively. Both are well known. Both are engaged in lawsuits. Both demand to be the center of attention. Both have been in high-profile relationships, and both create chaos in their respective workplaces. The only thing that sets them apart is that only one of them insists on having an intimacy coordinator during sex.
The truth is that you can’t pick up a newspaper or magazine, or search online for news without having to first navigate around the latest story about Blake Lively. That’s because she has become the latest poster girl for the Me Too movement in its fight against sexual harassment. Don’t get me wrong. Women have been and continue to be harassed by misogynist males who think it’s OK to make lewd comments to female co-workers, or touch them inappropriately. It’s even worse when that behavior is generated by male bosses. But lately, we have been bombarded by news of alleged harassment in Hollywood, particularly when a film or television production involves scenes of intimacy.
In Lively’s case, she claims that co-star/producer Justin Baldoni acted verbally and physically inappropriately during the filming of It Ends With Us. I won’t get into the specific, he said/she said elements of this particular case, except to say that over the past few years, film studios have increasingly assigned intimacy coordinators to be on set as a guardrail against unwanted actions that might otherwise be construed as sexual harassment. In fact, the intimacy coordinator profession has grown into such a cottage industry that there’s even an organization to represent it. Intimacy Directors International was established in 2016 to define the responsibilities of intimacy coordinators, including being on set to ensure that actors “continually consent to all scenes of intimacy.”
These coordinators are welcomed by some actresses and scoffed at by others, especially old-school performers like Gwyneth Paltrow who recently told Vanity Fair that she feels stifled by using an intimacy coordinator. While filming a number of sex scenes with Timothy Chalamet for the upcoming Marty Supreme, Paltrow was asked by the intimacy coordinator if she felt comfortable with a particular sexual position. Paltrow’s response was, “Girl, I’m from the era where you get naked, you get in bed, and the camera is rolling.” Another Hollywood veteran, Kim Basinger also told Variety that intimacy coordinators are unnecessary. “Either we work it out or we don’t. I don’t see the need for supervised visits,” said Basinger.
Granted things can get out of hand when an actor and actress are heating up the sheets during a racy scene, so much so that Nicole Kidman had to take a break from filming Babygirl. Meanwhile, other performers have allegedly just let nature take its course during filming, such as Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie in Don’t Look Now, and Michelle Borth in HBO’s Tell Me You Love Me. On the opposite end of the spectrum, there are actors who refuse roles just to avoid intimacy of any kind. Such is the case with Yellowstone villain Neal McDonough who says acting in sex scenes goes against his marriage vows, and Pat Boone who once declined to even kiss Shirley Jones in April Love without first getting permission from his wife.
I suppose the public will always be interested in what goes on behind the scenes in Hollywood, so it’s no wonder that the internet is inundated with the latest juicy gossip about all things sexual. I just wish there was less vitriol and more funny anecdotes to read about, like what happened during the 1974 filming of The Towering Inferno. As it so happens Faye Dunaway was nervous about her upcoming sex scene with Paul Newman, so in order to break the ice and put everyone at ease, just before Dunaway got into bed, Newman threw back the sheets to reveal that he was wearing cowboy boots and spurs. The prank broke everyone up, the tension was eased, and there was no need for either an intimacy coordinator or a bunch of attorneys to file lawsuits for harassment. Where’s Paul Newman when you need him.
Much Ado About Sex
If there was a competition for who gets the most media exposure it would be a tight race between Donald Trump and Blake Lively. Both are well known. Both are engaged in lawsuits. Both demand to be the center of attention. Both have been in high-profile relationships, and both create chaos in their respective workplaces. The only thing that sets them apart is that only one of them insists on having an intimacy coordinator during sex.
The truth is that you can’t pick up a newspaper or magazine, or search online for news without having to first navigate around the latest story about Blake Lively. That’s because she has become the latest poster girl for the Me Too movement in its fight against sexual harassment. Don’t get me wrong. Women have been and continue to be harassed by misogynist males who think it’s OK to make lewd comments to female co-workers, or touch them inappropriately. It’s even worse when that behavior is generated by male bosses. But lately, we have been bombarded by news of alleged harassment in Hollywood, particularly when a film or television production involves scenes of intimacy.
In Lively’s case, she claims that co-star/producer Justin Baldoni acted verbally and physically inappropriately during the filming of It Ends With Us. I won’t get into the specific, he said/she said elements of this particular case, except to say that over the past few years, film studios have increasingly assigned intimacy coordinators to be on set as a guardrail against unwanted actions that might otherwise be construed as sexual harassment. In fact, the intimacy coordinator profession has grown into such a cottage industry that there’s even an organization to represent it. Intimacy Directors International was established in 2016 to define the responsibilities of intimacy coordinators, including being on set to ensure that actors “continually consent to all scenes of intimacy.”
These coordinators are welcomed by some actresses and scoffed at by others, especially old-school performers like Gwyneth Paltrow who recently told Vanity Fair that she feels stifled by using an intimacy coordinator. While filming a number of sex scenes with Timothy Chalamet for the upcoming Marty Supreme, Paltrow was asked by the intimacy coordinator if she felt comfortable with a particular sexual position. Paltrow’s response was, “Girl, I’m from the era where you get naked, you get in bed, and the camera is rolling.” Another Hollywood veteran, Kim Basinger also told Variety that intimacy coordinators are unnecessary. “Either we work it out or we don’t. I don’t see the need for supervised visits,” said Basinger.
Granted things can get out of hand when an actor and actress are heating up the sheets during a racy scene, so much so that Nicole Kidman had to take a break from filming Babygirl. Meanwhile, other performers have allegedly just let nature take its course during filming, such as Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie in Don’t Look Now, and Michelle Borth in HBO’s Tell Me You Love Me. On the opposite end of the spectrum, there are actors who refuse roles just to avoid intimacy of any kind. Such is the case with Yellowstone villain Neal McDonough who says acting in sex scenes goes against his marriage vows, and Pat Boone who once declined to even kiss Shirley Jones in April Love without first getting permission from his wife.
I suppose the public will always be interested in what goes on behind the scenes in Hollywood, so it’s no wonder that the internet is inundated with the latest juicy gossip about all things sexual. I just wish there was less vitriol and more funny anecdotes to read about, like what happened during the 1974 filming of The Towering Inferno. As it so happens Faye Dunaway was nervous about her upcoming sex scene with Paul Newman, so in order to break the ice and put everyone at ease, just before Dunaway got into bed, Newman threw back the sheets to reveal that he was wearing cowboy boots and spurs. The prank broke everyone up, the tension was eased, and there was no need for either an intimacy coordinator or a bunch of attorneys to file lawsuits for harassment. Where’s Paul Newman when you need him.